Hurricane Hearts Read online

  When she took a step forward, I knew she intended to say more, so I hooked an arm around her, over her chest, and pulled her back, flush against me. Melissa wasn’t worth wasting our breath on. She’d never open her eyes and see the truth of me because she’d judged me years ago and wasn’t willing to see anything else. Bending my mouth to Birdie’s ear, I said, “Enough.”

  She yanked my arm from around her and spun to face me, the fire she’d breathed at Melissa now directed at me. “No, not enough. She needs to—”

  “I said enough, Birdie. We didn’t come here tonight to get into this shit again.” My own fire flashed back at her.

  Her mouth spread out into a thin line as she forced out a shitty breath. “Fine,” she snapped.

  Max had returned and looked anything but pleased.

  “We’re gonna get out of here,” I said to him.

  He nodded, glancing between the three of us. “Yeah, might be a good idea.”

  “Thanks for dinner,” I said, pulling my phone out, ready to order an Uber.

  Birdie looked at Max. “Thank you for dinner. I’m sorry it went downhill at the end.” Her voice was tight, and I knew she was working hard to keep her anger in check.

  After we said our goodbyes and I ordered an Uber, I followed Birdie outside to wait on the footpath. She went ahead of me, her body rigid, anger still blazing from her.

  I decided to give her a wide berth, not wanting to touch that anger because I’d worked hard to keep my own contained and it would only take a spark from her for it to break free.

  The Uber didn’t take long to arrive, but it was time in which the silence between us felt anything but silent.

  I opened the back door of the car and ushered Birdie in. She scooched across to the other side and I slid into the back seat next to her. She then turned to stare out the window while I made small talk with the driver.

  It was a fifteen-minute drive that felt like fifteen hours. Every second I carried on a conversation with the Uber driver, I was painfully aware that whatever was going on between Birdie and me tonight was building.

  When we pulled up outside the hotel, she exited the car and walked through the hotel doors without waiting for me. By the time I caught up with her, she stood waiting for the lift, eyeing the doors like she was praying for them to open and swallow her up.

  As soon as it arrived, she stepped in and pressed herself into the back corner. I moved next to her, noting the way she wrapped her arms around herself.

  We finally made it to our room and Birdie hurried to her bag, rummaging in it looking for something.

  “Are you cold?” I asked, wondering if she was searching for something warm.

  Her head jerked up and her angry gaze slammed into mine as she demanded, “Are you asking me that so you can give me your jacket again?”

  Her attitude agitated the strain between us and I failed to check myself. “What the fuck is with the attitude, Birdie?”

  Those beautiful eyes of hers flashed with more of her fire. “You’re running so hot and cold, sending me mixed signals about the space you asked for. One minute, you seem to want it, the next, not so much. I’m just trying to figure out where you’re at right now, because after we talked last night, I thought we were starting to get somewhere, but then you pulled right away again today.”

  I worked my jaw. “I had to pack up Dad’s personal belongings today. Where do you think I’m at after that?”

  “I can imagine where you are, but I don’t fucking know because you won’t talk to me!”

  “I can’t fucking talk about it. Did you ever stop to think about that?”

  “Yes! I know what it’s like to lose a parent, so I know how hard it is. But Jesus, Winter, when I ask you a question and all you give me is ‘yeah,’ I may as well have not even asked it. You gave Melissa more of an answer than you gave me about how you went at your dad’s today. How do you think that makes me feel?” She snatched something from her bag and came my way. “It makes me feel like maybe you actually don’t want a future with me. That maybe you just think you do because you wanted that for so long.”

  Pushing past me, she stalked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her with a heavy thud that matched the heavy thud of my heart.

  Fuck.

  She was wrong.

  So fucking wrong.

  I stormed into the bathroom, ignoring the closed door, refusing to acknowledge the privacy she wanted. This conversation wasn’t fucking finished. Not by a long shot.

  She’d undressed and now stood under the shower, water cascading down her curves. Her bewilderment met me as she angled her head my way.

  “When I tell you I want a future with you,” I growled, getting in the shower with her, boots and fucking all, “I fucking mean it.” I put my hands to her waist and spun her around so we faced each other. “Stop letting the bullshit in your head cause you to doubt that.”

  That pissed her off even more. Hands to my chest, she lashed out while attempting to push me away. “The bullshit in my head is in there because you’re putting it there!”

  I gripped her wrists. “How the fuck am I putting it there?”

  “With all this hot and cold behaviour.”

  I squeezed her wrists hard. “I’m hot and fucking cold because every time I think I’ve got shit about us figured out, I realise I don’t. I’m confused as hell as to how to fix this.”

  “Why do you have to fix it?” she demanded, wrenching her hands from mine. “Not everything is on you, Winter. God!”

  “Well who the fuck is it on then, Birdie? You’re the one who fucking walked out. I’m just trying to pick up the pieces and make sense of this mess.”

  She smacked me in the chest, wild and furious. “Yes! I walked out! And I’m more sorry about that than you will ever fucking know. But you can’t tell me you want a future together and not let me be a part of fixing the problem I created. Be angry. Get in my face. Be confused. But bring all that to me and share it with me so we can start rebuilding our relationship. Meet me in the middle.”

  “Fuck,” I hissed as her hurricane of emotions collided with mine. I wanted to cut this pain from my veins, from hers. It was fucking poison. But we couldn’t cut it out, couldn’t go around it, couldn’t fucking avoid it. All we could do was move through it and hurt together.

  Putting my hand to her stomach, I forced her back against the tiles and crushed my mouth to hers. My kiss was violent. Savage. Fucking brutal. I gave it all to her. Everything I hadn’t been able to express with words.

  Birdie moaned into my mouth as she grabbed handfuls of my hair, pulling it.

  A deep, guttural growl tore from me as we both brought our anger and hurt to our kiss; as our hands frantically demanded what we needed; as our souls bled their emotions all over the fucking place.

  Birdie ripped my clothes off, not once letting my lips go. The sound of her need filled my ears to the point where I was coming out of my skin, barely fucking able to restrain myself. She didn’t want that, though. She wanted this as rough and hard as I did.

  We needed to take our inner ache and experience it on a physical level. Lay it out, wide fucking open, exposed. Taste it. Feel it. Fucking breathe it.

  “Fuck,” I rasped, dragging my mouth from hers. “Fucking hell.”

  She stared up at me, breathless and fucking beautiful. When she reached for my dick, my hand snapped around her wrist. I wanted nothing more than her touch, but fuck, I needed to know she was in this with me.

  Keeping hold of her wrist with one hand, I brought my other one up to grip her face. “I’ll meet you in the middle, Angel, but if you’re not gonna be there, tell me now. Because no fucking way am I going through all this with you just to have you rip my fucking world out from under my feet again.”

  Torment flashed in her eyes and before I knew what was happening, she had her legs around me, her arms around me, and she was climbing me. She gripped the back of my neck. “I’m here. In the middle. Waiting for you, baby.
I’m never going anywhere ever again. Fucking never.” And then her lips smashed down onto mine and she kissed me like she’d never kissed me. Fierce. Bruising. Untamed. It was a promise and a plea all rolled into one.

  I knew she meant it. Felt it deep in my gut. And fuck if anything would hold me back now.

  I thrust inside her to the hilt before pulling out and doing it again.

  Jesus fucking Christ.

  I would never get enough of this woman.

  Birdie’s fingers tightened around my neck, her nails digging in so sharply I was sure she drew blood. She cried out with pleasure as I pounded into her, our rhythm unrelenting while we chased what we needed.

  We came together.

  Our bodies fused.

  Our pain shared.

  Our hurricane hearts entwined again.

  30

  BIRDIE

  Somehow, after Winter fucked me in the shower, we ended up on the floor of the hotel room. Well, not somehow; I knew how. He’d thrown me over his shoulder and taken me to the bed first for the roughest sex we’d ever had that lasted for longer than I could ever remember. Then, after I took a break and used the bathroom, he’d met me on my way back to the bed and fucked me up against the wall. I was thoroughly exhausted after that and barely able to stand, so we’d ended up on a blanket on the floor, his body almost crushing mine as he spooned me underneath another blanket.

  “Do you wanna know what I’m confused about at this point?” I asked as he lazily kissed a trail over my neck.

  “What?”

  “Why we’re on the floor when we could be comfortable on the bed?”

  He chuckled against my neck. “You remember that we trashed the bed earlier, right?” At my nod, he continued, “I didn’t want to give up any time with you in my arms. Remaking the bed would have necessitated that.”

  “So are you planning on us sleeping here? Because I’ve gotta say that’s not high on my list of fun things to do. Not even if you’re with me.”

  “Clearly I haven’t worn you out, Angel. Not if you’ve still got enough energy to grumble about the floor,” he said, his voice tinged with that growly tone I loved so much.

  When he slid his hand down my stomach, I knew where he was going. Reaching for it, I stopped his progress. “You’ve worn me out plenty.”

  He tightened his hold on me and kissed my neck again. “Go to sleep, baby.”

  His arms around me, his kisses, and his affection were everything I ever needed, and my entire body was lit with hope and happiness. I knew we had work ahead of us, but the fact we’d gotten from where we were hours ago to where we were now wasn’t something I’d take for granted. I would never take Winter for granted again.

  I tried to go to sleep, but while my body was exhausted, my mind wasn’t. My thoughts wouldn’t switch off. I never had been any good at keeping my thoughts to myself, and tonight was no exception.

  Snuggling back against Winter, I said, “How are Max and Melissa?” I hadn’t been able to get a good read on them at dinner. Possibly because my head had been full of Winter, but also because at first they seemed to be doing better, but by the end of dinner, not so much. I wondered how much of it was for show on Melissa’s part.

  “You’re not even close to sleep, are you?”

  I smiled at his tone. It was classic Winter when he had to listen to me go on and on about stuff. The man had some serious patience; I’d give him that. But he sometimes mixed it with low-level exasperation, and that was what I heard now.

  “I’m tired,” I said, “but my brain won’t go to sleep.”

  Before I knew what he was doing, he had me up and off the floor, and had scooped up the bedding that lay scattered around the bed. We really had made a mess of it earlier.

  As we made the bed together, Winter filled me in on what he knew about his brother’s marriage. Once he’d given me the update, he said, “I just want him to be happy. I couldn’t put up with Melissa, but who the fuck knows what goes on in others’ relationships. Maybe she has a side I haven’t seen.”

  I stopped what I was doing with the sheets and straightened, sending him a huge smile. My heart melted at the way Winter loved his brother.

  He narrowed his eyes at me. “What’s that smile for?”

  My smile grew and I crawled across the bed. Kneeling in front of him, I looped my hands around his neck. “I love you, Winter Morrison. Like you can’t even imagine. Like I’ve never loved anyone.”

  His features tightened as his arm hooked around my waist. Taking me down to the bed with him, he growled, “I should fucking hope like you’ve never loved anyone.”

  I took hold of his cheeks and lifted my head to kiss him. Winter’s possessiveness was something I loved, but I read between the lines and knew this time it was coloured with his feelings over us not being together for the last five years. “There’s never been anyone that mattered to me but you. I need you to know that. You’ve had my heart all this time and you’ll have it for the rest of our lives.”

  He dropped his lips to mine and kissed me again before repositioning us under the covers. He lay on his back and pulled me in close, his arm holding me tightly to his body. Since we’d worked our anger out, it was like he couldn’t let me go.

  “We haven’t talked about what you went through when you lost the baby,” he said softly. “Or about how you coped with losing your other tube. When exactly did it happen?”

  I tensed at his question, not because I didn’t want to discuss this, but because of the guilt I felt over it, and the loss I still felt sharply. That loss could slice pain deeply in my soul in the most unexpected moments. However, I knew he needed these answers, so I gave them to him. “I fell pregnant when you were home on leave for your cousin’s funeral during your last tour. The doctor monitored me with blood tests every few days so he could rule out another ectopic pregnancy, but at six weeks he determined it was ectopic. He recommended surgery rather than an injection and things didn’t go as well as he hoped.”

  “Fuck,” he said. “I wish I’d known, Angel. I would have been there for you. Six weeks of that and then having to deal with everything that happened….”

  I shifted so I could look up at him, hating the pain I saw on his face. “I know you would have, but it was on me. I made the decision to get pregnant; I dealt with the consequence. Mum and Cleo were there for me.”

  “It wasn’t on you,” he said with force. “Fuck, losing a baby was definitely not on you. I don’t ever want you to think that again. And I’m so fucking sorry I’ve spent the last few days unable to think straight about this. You keep saying you’re sorry I might not be able to have children, but you always wanted children just as much as I did; I’m sorry this has been taken away from you.”

  Tears filled my eyes, which Winter gently wiped away. Then, with regret clear in his eyes, he said, “I talked with your mum a lot after we broke up, and looking back now, I’m pretty sure she came close to telling me about the baby. There were times when she seemed like she had something to say but then held it back. I should have fucking pushed her.”

  I moved to straddle him and then leaned forward, bringing my chest close to his. “Promise me you won’t waste time looking back with regret at the things you think you should or could have done. We’ve wasted enough time; I just want to get on with living in the now and planning our future. I want babies with you, somehow, some way. I want to watch you teach our children in the same way your father taught you. And I want to grow old with you in a home filled with the kind of memories we were lucky enough to make when we were kids. I know you’re still hurting here”—I placed my hand over his heart—“and that it will take you time to move past that, but I don’t think looking back all the time will help. I think we have to look forward.”

  Winter took hold of my face, sliding his hands up into my hair, and kissed the hell out of me. He kept his lips to mine as he switched our positions so he was on top of me. When he finally dragged his mouth from mine, he said, “Y
ou will be a mother; I will make fucking sure of it. And our children will be the luckiest kids alive because of who their mother is.” He dropped another kiss to my lips before adding, with the kind of Winter-grin that made my ovaries explode, “Just so you know, I plan on being one of those dirty old men who can’t keep his hands to himself. Those memories you wanna make are gonna include a lot of filthy sex right up until the day I die.”

  I returned his grin. “I know, because you really are your father’s son. That man’s hands were all over your mother every time I saw them together.”

  He laughed and kissed me, again. “Fuck I’ve missed you, baby. You will never leave my sight again if I can fucking help it.”

  I laughed, too, and wondered how I had ever managed to stay away from him for so long. Then, turning serious, I whispered, “I think Birdie Morrison has a good ring to it. Do you?”

  Heat flashed in those eyes of his. Then, arching a brow, he said, “What happened to us starting off with dating again?”

  “Well, I guess we could, if that’s what you want….”

  When his lips met mine this time, they were demanding, and expressed so much more than just a kiss. I was breathless and needy by the time he was done. “No fucking way are we going back to dating,” he growled, causing desire to pool low in my belly. God, I will never have enough of him.

  “Good, because I plan on moving in with you as soon as we get back to Sydney. And I’m not even taking no for an answer.”

  “Fucking hell, woman,” he said, grinding his dick against me, “This bossy side of you has me hard as fuck. There’s not going to be any sleep for either of us tonight.”

  Wrapping my legs around him and rolling my hips to meet his moves, I said with a grin, “I don’t know…. Just because I talk too much, you want to shut me up with your dick.”

  “No,” he said forcefully, “I can deal with your need to talk my fucking ear off. This”—he rocked into me again—“is because you are by far the sexiest woman alive and I can’t get enough of you.”